What is Communication? Communication is seen as an interaction between two or more individuals. But it is more than speaking or writing. Communication requires the creation of a common understanding of ideas, desires, and observations by people. It is said that communication is dynamic, continuous, irreversible, and interactive.
Types of communication?
Communication includes written and nonverbal behaviors as well as speaking, and has its goal to affect the knowledge or behavior of another. When we try to communicate our thoughts effectively, we need to understand communication can’t be done only by using words. It needs the understanding of nonverbal cues as well. The types of communication are- verbal and nonverbal. Verbal communication uses oral or written words. It is mainly done through spoken words. But here, nonverbal communication is used as well. Nonverbal communication includes body language, facial expressions, pitch, tone, gestures, etc. For example, if someone is using a high pitch, we may understand that the individual is excited or angry depending on the context and situation.
Types of Relationships
Social Relationships
These consists of familial relationships such as husband-wife, mother-child, siblings, grandparent-child; friendly relationships such as school friends, college friends, etc.
Professional Relationships
The ones that you have with your boss, colleagues, work friends, mentor, etc. are all professional relationships.
Fiduciary Relationships
A fiduciary relationship is the one where you place your trust in someone, and seek their help. These consist of doctor-patient, psychologist/counselor-client, etc. These also have some ethical guidelines.
Online Relationships
In the age of technology, where one can easily communicate, we can form relationships with people all over the world.
Importance in social relationships
In social relationships, communication is important because it helps keep the relationship healthy. Unless, one communicates effectively, it will lead to a breeding ground for misunderstanding. And misunderstanding only gives rise to conflicts, problems, or embarrassment. Communication helps develop intimacy and love in a relationship. When two people in a relationship are effective communicators, they have a higher likelihood in resolving problems.
Importance in professional relationships
In professional relationships, miscommunication has much more serious consequences. It will lead to work problems, which can label you as incompetent. Being able to communicate, helps one build a positive professional image for themselves as well the company they work at. Communication also helps work efficiently in groups. It increases productivity, innovation, and boosts growth.
Backbone of relationships
Efficient communication makes relationships clear and harmonious. Sometimes the simplest communication can clear things up. It’s how people learn to work in a team, resolve arguments, and get to know each deeper. It creates a sense of unity. A healthy communication style makes it better to resolve conflicts and build a healthier partnership. Communication is how we communicate our needs and this helps you stay connected.
Roadblocks in Communication
Roadblocks are those which stop you from reaching your goal. Communication roadblocks are those when neither of the individuals involved feel understood. Research has found four particularly negative styles of communication, often referred to as the “four horsemen of the apocalypse,” (Gottman, 1999, p.27) because if left unchecked, these styles of interaction can eventually become lethal to relationships.
Criticism
This is like attacking the character or personality of another. It is normal to have complaints about an action, but criticism is putting down others as a person. Criticism focuses on negative behaviors.
Contempt
Contempt portrays disgust, and a lack of respect for the other person. This includes eye rolling, sneering, scoffing, etc.
Defensiveness
It is okay to get hurt by a criticism, but when it escalates to conflict, that is defensiveness. We tend to stop listening to other’s viewpoint and communication.
Stonewalling
Withdrawing communication and refusing to engage in discussion is stonewalling. It is ‘silent treatment.’
How to resolves conflicts?
When saying something that you think will hurt someone to an extent, try to start with positive things. Then go on sharing your feelings, focusing on problems along with thoughts and feelings. This will soften the startup.
Make attempts to mend relationship. Holding a grudge will only damage the relationship more.
Make it a ‘I’ problem instead of a ‘You’ problem. Saying ‘You did something bad’ will feel like a blame game.
If angry, remove yourself from the situation. Talk only when calm and rational.
How to avoid hurting others?
There’s a famous saying – In a relationship, conflict is not two individuals against one another; it is the two individuals against the problem. One of the biggest things to keep in mind is to NOT keep any biases, preconceived notions, etc. This makes the person think you are not open to communication. Do not justify your behavior. Instead say- “I understand/ I’ll try” Think about the words you’ll use. Think before you act Sometimes the harsh words hurt people.
How to effectively communicate?
Flawed communication can be avoided through the acquirement of basic communication skills.
These include:-
Listening - Listening and hearing are different. Listening requires giving attention and perceiving what the other person says.
Asking questions which will require elaborate answers. Only asking yes or no questions will bring a dead end to the conversation.
Clarifying is a great technique to avoid miscommunication. This will not only clear any doubts but also make the speaker feel you are paying attention.
Paying attention to non-verbal gestures is also a skill. Assess and interpret them as a person may say something, but non-verbal gestures indicate something different.
All these things make the guide to effective communication. Effective communication is an essential practice, and can result in improves interpersonal relationship. It is also necessary to negotiate the challenges of everyday living. The opportunities effective relationship give for personal and relationship growth are well worth the effort.
References
Brower, N., & Darrington, J. (2012). Effective communication skills: resolving conflicts.
Grover, S. M. (2005). Shaping effective communication skills and therapeutic relationships at work: The foundation of collaboration. Aaohn Journal, 53(4), 177-182.
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