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Guilt - Dealing with It

Updated: Apr 11, 2023

"Guilt is to the spirit, what pain is to the body"- Elder David A. Bednar


What is Guilt?

Guilt is an unpleasant feeling that a person feels as a result of having done something wrong. When a person believes that they should do much more or much better, guilt takes over. They are distressed because they believe they should do something to correct their mistakes. It can be reversed through treatment such as counseling or talking with a therapist or counselor.


Why Do You Feel Guilt?
  • Anxiety: If a person has a great deal of anxiety, they may be more likely to negatively assess their actions in the ways that lead to feelings of guilt.

  • Social pressure: When a person feels other people are judging them for the things they have done, they might be left with the feeling of guilt.

  • Childhood experiences: Children who are raised in households where they are made to feel that they have done something wrong, or are responsible for problems are then left with the feeling of guilt.

  • Trauma: Some past experiences tend to develop a feeling of guilt in people because of the actions performed in the past.

  • The conflict between personal values and choice: There might be guilt in a person because of the choices they have made in the past and now they might regret it because of the choices they have made.


Symptoms of Guilt
  • Low self-esteem: When a person makes a mistake, they feel guilty about it every time they think about it, which affects their self-esteem.

  • Denial: When a person feels guilty, they tend to avoid their feelings. This is because they feel ashamed of their past actions.

  • Sleep problems: Sometimes when a person is overcome by guilt, their sleep clock gets hampered. They can't sleep peacefully because they regret things they have done.

  • Disconnection: When a person feels guilt, they may try to be alone and avoid people as much as they can. This disconnects them from other people and can have negative effects on their psyche.

  • Sadness: When a person is feeling guilty, they mostly feel depressed. There is a feeling of sadness among them as they can't experience any other emotions like happiness or joyfulness.


How Do You Deal with Guilt?

Learn from Past Mistakes

It is important to understand that we cannot always take control of or change a situation. We can't leave the past behind; we have to accept the past and move on.


Forgive Yourself

When you forgive yourself, you acknowledge that you made a mistake, like all humans do. Take responsibility for your actions, try to practice self-acceptance, and trust yourself to do better in the future.


Talk to People You Trust

People often have a hard time discussing their guilt. The people who care for you will offer you kindness and compassion. Additionally, sharing unpleasant or difficult feelings often relieves stress.


Replace Negative Self-talk with Positive Self-talk

Remember, a mistake doesn't make you a bad person; instead, learn from it. All humans make mistakes, and nobody in this entire world is perfect. Everybody has some flaws in them. Make an effort to learn from your mistakes and move on.


Talk to a Therapist

If the guilt is too much to handle and if it is causing you severe distress, it may be a good idea to talk to a therapist. The therapist may offer you some guidance by helping you identify and address the causes of the guilt. This might aid you in exploring some coping mechanisms to overcome your guilt.


Treatment for Guilt

Guilt isn’t incurable. Some of the methods that can be used for getting over guilt are:

  • Therapy is the best treatment for severe, distressing guilt. A therapist is likely to begin by working with the person seeking help to understand what contributes to their feeling of guilt.

  • Treatment for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) may help people who blame themselves and experience a feeling of guilt after a traumatic event.

  • People with feelings of guilt linked with abuse, and assault, may struggle to accept that what happened was not their fault. Trauma therapy may help a person to reframe the event, try to understand that they did nothing wrong, and begin to heal from the trauma.

  • Counseling can help to treat both physical and mental health concerns and help the person develop greater compassion towards themselves.


References

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